In my entire existence on this planet, I have only ever been in love with one other person. And to have him love me back is the best thing I’ve ever felt. You just get so caught up in each other, wanting to be with each other and make out all the time. You share things with each other and make each other laugh. You tell each other you love each other all the time; so much that others get sick of it, but you don’t care because you’re so wrapped up in each other. Everything you do with each other is amazing and exciting until one day, he does something completely stupid and careless to break your soul completely in half. Yes, the other girl. I don’t know who it was, but I hope it was awful, and I hope you get hit by a freight train full of anvils. But for him to tell you about these things, and you know you’ve done nothing to deserve it, hurts so badly. I didn’t know a human heart could literally feel physical pain over getting broken by someone, but it can. And it feels like your chest has been ripped open, and your heart has been stabbed repeatedly. You feel constantly nauseous, and tears just keep rolling down your face making you look like an idiot.
But I love him.
He has one more chance to mess things up, and I’m kicking him out of my life. I completely hate myself for this, but I feel as if God put this stupid boy in my life for a reason, and I should give him one last shot. My heart is still broken, but hopefully it will be mended if we can get our relationship back to Happy and Loving. I only put this on tumblr because I have nobody to vent to. Nobody I actually know in real life knows anything about this. So thank you, tumblr, for being a good listener, and putting up with my bullshit sob story that every other human goes through.